2021年2月1日我过了一个很难忘的生日，难忘到可能我以后都不会想结婚谈恋爱。

At eight o'clock in the morning, Dad used the mop that my mother had just cleaned to wipe the mud on the ground, the two began to quarrel, lying on the bed, at first I thought that they were the same stirring mouth as before, the more the noise became more and more intense, dropped things and slammed the door, and even fought hard, I ran out in my pajamas, yes, they fought, I have seen such a scene many times, but this time Dad really did not give in the slightest, as if he was fighting hard to punch and kick this mother, I ran over to hug my mother, and my back was kicked by my father, This kick is very heavy, it can be said that I used all my strength, and my tears couldn't help but flow, not because of pain, but more because I felt cold.

Since I know that my parents are always endless quarrels, I will not listen to any party's rhetoric, because I have the ability to distinguish right from wrong, other people's homes, are very happy, very happy, every day is laughing haha, but my home, every day is full of depression, every day is endless quarrels, and even fights, no one in the neighborhood does not know the situation of my family, it is indeed quite a lot of shame, sometimes, the two will quarrel outside, fight, I hate this home, I don't want to stay for a moment , I even had the heart to die, and occasionally I heard my mother talking to my aunt, and my aunt asked my mother, why not divorce? What is the point of you staying like this? Are you really bullied by their family like this? Mom said, let's quarrel, fight, fight, I can't let my daughter not have a complete family, if I can endure, just for my daughter.At that moment, how broken my mother's heart had to be, how desperate my mother had to be to say this sentence so calmly.

Many people may think that dad is so good to mom, and dad's family is not good for mom, it must be mom's own problem, from my birth to understanding to now adulthood, my memory will always be the scene of dad's family bullying mom, the most impressive thing is that when I slept in the room with my mother in the middle of the night, my aunt and grandma came to beat my mother, and even did something to me, just because my mother got up in her heart to make them supper, how vicious these people are, the father on the side did not stop the behavior of the aunt and grandma, Instead, he echoed them to count down his mother, before marrying his father, his mother was also the heart of his grandfather, his father's marriage, his grandmother did not agree at the beginning, his mother wanted to marry dead or alive, no wedding, no bride price, nothing, his mother married the past, she thought she got the love she thought she had, thought that the man who promised him to be good to him all his life would be good to him, but after getting married, everything changed, and everything did not develop as she thought at all.

My mother became a full-time mother for me, because the family was unwilling to help her take me, she had no way, she stayed at home to take care of me, the mother without financial resources had a lower status in this family, and everyone's attitude towards her was even worse, looking for her stubble at every turn, insulting her, time passed, I also grew up, grandma is also old, my aunt is also married, no one wants to support grandma, but in the end, it is not the daughter-in-law who she makes things difficult every day and curses every day, My mother's life over the years can be described as miserable, compared to my peers, I was more precocious, and when I was six or seven years old, I would follow my older children to the forest to find all kinds of herbs to buy for money, because I didn't want my mother to feel uncomfortable, and I didn't want my mother to see the face of anyone in the family.

My parents' marriage made me break all the beauty of love marriage, I saw the desperate love when my father let my mother get out, I saw the viciousness of everyone in this family, the embarrassment of my daughter-in-law, I saw my mother's forbearance over the years, I was thinking about how difficult my mother has endured all these years? How painful is it? Because I didn't listen to my grandmother's words, she has not been happy in her life, and the feelings of my parents' generation are so unbearable, so that I, who is only 19 years old, will no longer have any illusions and longings for love, I would rather live alone with my mother, earn money by myself, buy a house by myself, repay my own mortgage, repay my car loan, which is not a kind of happiness and happiness.