When others encounter problems, when we ask questions, we can not directly tell the other party the answer to the question, but ask others" what else can we do?" The other party does not have to answer this open question immediately, but causes them to think deeply, let the other party seek the answer to the question on their own, so as to generate a sense of pleasure in the heart to solve the inner problem.
A wise old man saw a group of young men pulling weeds in a weed-infested wasteland. The young men complained because they had gone to great lengths to pull the weeds and they would grow again next year. The wise old man did not tell them what to do, but asked the question: What else can you do but pull up the weeds like this? What else can we do? After hearing this question, the young people were at a loss. They didn't know what to do?
In the second year, the wise old man came to the barren grassy place again, and in front of him was a golden wheat.It turned out that the problem of the wise old man caused the young people to think, and they thought of planting wheat on the wasteland, so that they would no longer have to pull up the wild grass.
The story is mainly about learning to ask: What else can we do?
The main theory is the "Window of Johari".
The internal logic of change 30 questions
5. What do you keep repeating about yourself?
11. What do you need?
12. What are the needs of others?
13. Why is this important to you?
14. What is the reason?
15. What's holding you back?
16. What are you afraid of?
17. What do you think about this?
18. What makes you believe in this belief?
19. What do you wish you believe?
20. When you really believe in this belief, what difference does it make?
VII. Who I Am:
21. What is this challenge to support you in becoming yourself?
22. If it's not for money, what will be your life's work?
25. What is the new awareness of the present moment?
1. Powerful questioning generates strength in the unknown area, blind area and potential area of the other party; The good questions come from the unknowns and blind spots that I really hear about him, from deep positive listening.
2. Growth happens in making mistakes
3. When I see children, students, when they don't believe in themselves, I will support them by asking questions, which can be so! Through the way itself discovers, such growth is from the inside out.
5. Do you want to be seen? - what does it mean for you to be seen?
10. Don't give the method, be conscious to do it
Group course summary: The fifth course study, focusing on practicing coaching questions, the coached person is Gao Shouxia, how to communicate well and effectively with high school children?
Coach Jingfei, Teacher Wang Kai, Teacher Zhu Hongmin and Teacher Zhang Junhong, the four people took turns to ask questions, and Teacher Shouxia scored the questions raised by the four of us.
The questions raised by our group were:
1. What kind of communication do you think is good communication with your child?
2. What do you think the ideal communication scene looks like?
3. What kind of communication do you want to achieve with your child, and do you feel the most satisfied?
4. When you communicate with your child, who is the problem that hinders communication?
5. What kind of communication effect do you expect to achieve?
6. What kind of communication do you want to do with your child?
Coach Jingfei and teacher Wang Kai also stressed that when asking questions, listening is the most important, and the questions raised should be able to cause the questioner to think, open thinking, so that the coached person's thinking is clearer and the atmosphere is more friendly.
Finally, in the large classroom, the representatives of each group summarized, we have a clearer understanding of the coaching dialogue, the coach is to ask questions, without any presets, but to ask questions curiously according to the questioner's questions, so that the other party has awareness and thinking, in the future work and learning, the flexible use of coaching questions, and strive to make the questions create changes!